I'm the director.
I'm the scriptwriter.
They are the best of extras.
Stick to the script, nothing must go wrong!
Follow the script and stay in character.
I understand.
Save your breath!
She's not coming!
She said she wouldn't shed a tear if you were to drop dead in front of her!
She's really that heartless? She doesn't have me in her heart?
I thought you were dying!
Why are you still breathing?
What?
It's just momentary before death!
That's right!
Right!
I just woke up!
The patient is awake! Action!
How dangerous!
Watch it! Emergency treatment...
Out of the way...the doctor is reviving the patient.
Emergency treatment?
Yes!
He was fine, why emergency treatment?
Appearances can be deceiving.
Just like he didn't look you up
doesn't mean he doesn't miss you.
Yes! He was worried when he found out the trouble you're in.
It was the worrying that got him sick!
Start talking to him
if you do that, he'll be fine!
Talking to him can make him well?
He means it can take a load off his mind.
Right...
What happened?
He's dead?
No, the doctor is worried he's cold.
See! He's not dead.
How is he, Doctor?
His pulse is very weak.
He needs a respirator to keep him alive.
Yes, he needs to breathe!
Poor Daddy, he's so weak!
But the respirator is not connected!
Of course, I'm supplying the oxygen.
Enough of this nonsense!
Everyone get out!
I want you and your daughter to stay.
Let's go!
Daddy, I'll stay!
You must get out!
Are you alright?
Thanks for coming.
I thought I'd never see you again.
Maybe you hate me and won't forgive me.
But I truly want to say this...I'm sorry!
Tsau-shui, what I did was not good enough!
I made you both suffer.
I hope you'll let me make it up to you.
Your lines are beautifully written.
For how long have you worked on them?
Over 30 years.
That's too bad! The script is good.
The acting is horrible.
Who'd believe you?
The acting looks fake, but not the feelings.
I might have played dead,
but I'm not getting any younger.
I won't rest in peace if I died without saying what I just said.
Darling, you've never called me Daddy.
Can you just say it once?
Daddy!
Alright...don't sound like you're dying!
I have plenty of work to do at home.
I'm leaving. Let's go!
Please stay!
Bite your tongue! This is a hospital!
I don't mean stay in the hospital.
I want you to stay with me.
I haven't done my part as a husband and father.
I hope you'll give me a chance to make it up to you.
What's taking it so long?
I hope they're in a car crash!
Here they are!
I wish the car would explode!
Let me...
Madam! Miss Ching-man!
Welcome, Auntie Shui! Sis!
Call me a free spirit,
I'm touched we're reunited as a family.
I was so excited I couldn't sleep last night
Give them a hand if you're so happy!
Sure, Mr Yau! Excuse me...
You need not wait out here for us.
It's so windy. You'd catch a cold!
I couldn't wait to see you.
Daddy!
Good girl! Let's go in!
What about the luggage?
They'll take care of it.
Hey! What's-your-name...
My name is Lo Wen.
Lewinsky? Expect me to carry this by myself?
Hey!
From now on, you will wait on Madam Shui and Miss Ching-man.
You must do as they wish, understand?
Yes, Master!
Ching-man!
Here's the house key and several car keys.
Membership card to a private club and a black card.
Tell me whatever you need.
Daddy, I really don't need all these!
This is nothing!
Tell them to come in!
I've set up a team to help you.
Your chauffeur, bodyguard, gourmet chef,
financial analyst, a lawyer and a personal stylist.
Excuse me...
Daddy, I don't need them.
At least an assistant to do your errands
and do the heavy lifting.
I've been demoted?
No, the assistant is not here yet.
But if you're a good boy, you can help your sister.
What did you say, Daddy?
You call me a good boy? I want that!
Shut up and help your sister take her luggage upstairs.
I like the feeling of a family, Sis!
Let's go up!
Let me help you.
Thanks, Sis!
Let me help you, Miss Ching-man!
Good! Let them do it!
Let's go up, Sis!
Good!
I'll go with you!
No, follow me! I have something to show you.
A trap?
No, it's your old room.
Come in and take a look.
It's exactly like before!
Since you left, I've had the room sealed off
and kept everything as is,
hoping you'll be back some day.
Are you really that sentimental?
I haven't changed since I met you.
Remember that night?
Who is it?
It's me!
It's late, why are you still up?
I can hear you whimpering...
I couldn't sleep. She has gone too far.
The way she tortured you...
I will...get...even for...you!
Can you speak faster?
I will get even for you!
I'm just the maid. You must not stand up for me.
To me, you're not...the maid.
You're a beauty!
I've brought you an ointment.
Shall I put it on for you?
Your hand is so soft...
You have a sweet tongue, Master.
You're absolutely right!
She should never have bitten you!
Next time, don't try to stand up for me.
I don't love that woman.
If not for our prenatal betrothal, I would...
Say no more, Master!
She's still your wife, you should be nice to her.
But my heart is somewhere else.
Where is it?
My heart is over...there!
Really? My heart is over...there too!
Really?
Master! Tsau-shui!
May I?
Do what?
Molest you!
You come here even; night,
what if your wife finds out?
Good! I want to divorce her!
Divorce?
Why?
Because I want to be with you.
Wear this, Tsau-shui!
Master!
Don't call me that!
What else should I call you?
You tell me!
Honey! Honey!
Honey!
I want to tell you something.
What?
Get out of there, adulterers!
It's your wife!
We're the golden boy and girl, not adulterers!
I'll put her in her place!
Honey!
You were gone when I woke up.
You left me a letter telling me not to find you
and enclosed the ring I gave you.
That's not what happened.
I never wrote you any letters.
When you fainted, your wife kicked me out.
She gave me a letter from you
saying what we had was a fling.
You told me not to take it seriously.
I was so angry I flung the ring at her.
I didn't write any letters either.
She lied to us!
If I had known the truth, none of this would have happened.
If I had known better, I wouldn't have sent you away!
Tsau-shui, I finally found you!
Why did...you avoid me?
I don't know what you're saying, Mr Yau.
I have nothing to do with you! Go away!
Please come back, my wife is dead!
You only want me back because you're lonely!
Mom, where are my toys?
Ching-man, let me finish talking and I'll get you your toys.
Go back inside!
You have a daughter?
She's...
Is she mine?
Don't you dare fight for her custody!
It must have been hard for you to raise her alone.
I didn't know...please come back!
Now you want to look after us?
Where were you when I was pregnant?
Where were you when she was born?
And when she was sick and we couldn't feed ourselves?
Where was I?
Luckily the Fujian Fried Rice Association took us in.
Now that we're settled down,
you want us back?
Please come back.
Don't bother to look for us!
Or we'll disappear forever, go away!
Tsau-shui...
I dared not look you up since that day.
But I never stopped thinking of you.
It's over. Let's not bring it up.
Ching-man and I have come back.
Where am I going to sleep tonight?
You expect me to sleep in here?
Of course not!
Yau Cheung will be attending a charity ball tonight.
And Chai Tsau-shui will appear with him in public for the first time.
We'll cover the event live.
Hurry...Daddy, have a drink!
Auntie Shui!
Sis!
Have a drink!
Thanks!
Are you hungry?
Want something to eat? I'll get it for you!
Go...get me something nice.
I'm running to the toilet.
You're so cute!
You know how to serve your family.
Why are you such a good boy! Tell me...
People change.
Which part? You had plastic surgery?
I'm warning you, don't touch my face or...
What will you do?
I will walk away.
You're walking away from my sister?
He's really cute, Sis!
Piss him off and he'll walk away!
Don't provoke him now!
He's on the verge of losing his inheritance.
Unlike me, who has billions and no heir.
He won't get a penny?
He may keel over and die!
He should be so cute then!
I'll teach String Bean and the Dwarf a lesson when I have money.
Why haven't we started the ball?
We're waiting for the Chairperson.
Who's that?
You arranged for Mrs Yau...I mean miss Barbara to be the Chairperson,
but she's not here yet.
It's Barbara!
Can we interview you, Miss Barbara?
Why are you here?
Pose for a picture...
Barbara is here! We have a show to watch!
Say a few words...
Sorry, no interviews...
Mommy! You're finally back to help me fight for my inheritance.
I didn't come here for that!
What are you doing here?
Where's your Daddy?
Over there!
Mr Yau, the Chairperson is here.
We can start the ceremony.
How are you?
It's inappropriate for you to show up today.
Why is it inappropriate?
Mom, you think there'll be trouble?
Don't worry. I've seen it all.
I'm more worried about your Daddy.
I don't know what the woman will do.
Let's take a picture, shall we?
Please take a picture for us.
Over here, 1...2...3...
How about a picture with Chai Tsau-shui?
Sure!
So you're the one Mr Yau was waiting for.
I'm sorry to have kept you in the dark.
I apologize for Mr Yau.
Don't say that. Nobody owes anyone anything in this matter.
Let's take a picture.
Sure!
Over here, please!
Mr Yau, so there are Z Mrs Yau now?
Didn't you break up with Miss Barbara?
They're both here tonight, is this a showdown?
Having more than one wife is a crime.
My experience tells me to cherish those who love you.
Who is the one you love most?
Well...
Let's not bother Mr Yau anymore.
I came here for one purpose.
As you know I chair several charity and women's organisations...
I hereby resign from all my posts.
What? What?
What's your relationship with Yau Cheung?
Are you still Mrs Yau?
The real Mrs Yau is over there.
From now on, I can be myself.
We did the first dance the day I became the Chairperson.
Now that I'm resigning, mind if we have the last dance?
You don't mind Barbara dancing with Daddy?
She was with him for over 20 years,
and is probably hit hardest in this matter.
If she doesn't mind me showing up,
why would I mind her dancing with your Daddy?
I thank you from the bottom of my heart,
for taking such good care of me and my sister.
I'm truly grateful to you.
I hope you'll be happy with the real Mrs Yau.
An extra! An extra...
What is it?
Lam Tsoi-yeh, why are you so happy?
Exactly!
Did you read the newspaper?
There'll be a by-election for the District Counselor in this district.
Then you can run for office!
If you run for office, you have my support.
Yes!
Mine too!
I'll make soup for you.
I'll wipe your sweat.
Go for it!
You must go for it!
Lam Tsoi-yeh!
Ching-man! You came here to shop?
I came for you!
What is it with you all?
What were you talking about?
He's running for District Counselor.
He's going after Chai Tsau-shui's old job.
You're not afraid Ching-man will be mad?
Ching-man...
The web-cast cost your Mom her job as District Counselor.
Will you be mad at me?
Don't be silly! It wasn't your fault!
It was a blessing in disguise.
We're reunited with my Daddy.
I ought to thank you.
You're not mad?
I said "no"!
You must go for it if you run for office.
I'll be pleased if you win the seat.
I'll do my best!
Thanks for all your support and encouragement.
Let's go somewhere to celebrate.
Great! Sure!
Where do you want to go?
Can't think of anywhere else but Lamma Island.
Let's go there, my treat!
Great! Good!
For the seafood!
I'm off duty now. Let's go after I've changed.
Aren't we celebrating together?
Exactly! Exactly'!
One bowl of bean curd jelly.
You're sharing? How sweet!
I'll throw in a bowl for free.
A date should be happy and sweet!
Look! It's pretty!
How much is this? $200
That's too much! Forget it!
I'm buying it for my girlfriend.
Can you give me a discount?
$100 just for you!
It's for you! Thanks!
I didn't expect so many perks if we pretended to be on a date.
Exactly! I didn't know it's so much fun!
Real dates should be fun too.
I don't know. I have never been this happy.
That depends on your date.
I'm especially happy when I'm with you.
Are you on a date?
Yes! We are!
Good! Would you like to try our lover's set?
Sure! Great!
Enjoy!
Just one order?
It's meant to be shared by sweet lovers.
What do you mean?
You're sharing the food.
What?
Can you give us another set of cutlery?
Can't do that!
This set dictates that one person does the cutting and feeding.
What? What?
Or we'll charge for two.
I'll start cutting.
Do we have any discounts for lovers' sets?
Yes, as long as you take a picture.
The discount you get depends on the intimacy of the picture.
Such as?
Come take a look!
What's the discount for an arm around the shoulders?
10%.
Face to face?
That's 20%.
Which one gets the most discount?
This one...50% off.
That's a lot cheaper.
For the sake of my wallet,
come on, 1...Z...3...
Hold on...
Are you done?
There!
Thanks! Don't you want to see the picture?
I used to see this in the pictures.
Now that I have tried it myself,
the feeling is very different.
They say when you look up at the stars,
you'll think of the person you love.
Lam Tsoi-yeh, who are you thinking of?
I have someone I'm thinking of.
He's lying right next to me.
Today we pretended we're sweethearts.
It's the happiest day of my life.
It'd be great if all my days from now on could be like this.
Better yet, if I'm really your girlfriend.
Who are you in love with?
You were supposed to be asleep!
I was. I just woke up.
I heard you say you're in love with someone.
Is it the coconut tart?
No!
There's someone else?
You love someone other than coconut tart?
What is it to you?
Just nosy! Let me guess...
Dumpling? No!
Reverend Ma? That's crazy!
His son Mario? Not interested!
Can it be Ko Yam?
Watch your mouth!
MY Dad?
Stop making wild guesses!
There's no one else at Tyrant Residence but me.
I'll go get something to drink.
I have it right here!
I'll get something to eat.
Didn't you eat enough just now?
I'll go get...
Don't feel so embarrassed!
I'm in love with you too.
I said I'm crazy about you. Very much so!
Since when?
The day we met again.
Why didn't you tell me?
You have a boyfriend.
You know I don't love him.
Does he love you?
Very much! He can't live without me.
Exactly!
If I told you and you broke up with him,
I'd become an intruder.
That'd be very inorganic.
You didn't want to be inorganic, so you didn't tell me?
Yes, now this is very organic!
You're such a creep!
Where are you going?
Catch the ferry!
The last one just left.
Why didn't you tell me?
About the last ferry?
Or about I love you?
Fine!
I dodge!
I hate you!
Dodge that again!
Everyone, I have decided to run for office in the District Council.
Will you show me your support?
You know we will.
Of course I will!
Exactly, if you run, we'll chip in money or effort.
Hold on...why are you asking us this?
I need your help.
With what? With what?
I need you to sign your name.
In order to become eligible,
I need 10 voters' endorsement.
I'm not a registered voter. Are you?
Of course not! But they are!
Not us!
Me neither!
Not me!
Me neither!
Then how can you support me?
I'm a voter!
Great! Sign here, Dumpling!
But I belong to the Hong Kong Island.
Will that be a problem?
Are you all toying with me?
Don't be mad, I have brothers in this district.
It's not that hard to find 10 voters.
Thanks, Dumpling!
Don't mention it!
Now that the problem is solved. There're no problems anymore.
Let's get back to work!
Back to work then!
No, it's not solved!
It's not?
You said you'll chip in money if you can’t chip in effort.
You're running for office.
Why should we pay for it?
Exactly!
I need to pay a deposit.
There's a deposit? How much?
It's $3,000.
Is that all?
You'll pay it?
My phone is ringing. We'll talk later.
I have work to do.
I have a headache!
Mosquitoes!
I have to pick up the fish balls.
Dumpling, why are you crouching?
I'm praying for you.
You're a bunch of talkers!
This is the support you're showing me?
Consider it a loan, OK?
All investments involve risks.
Exactly! If you lose, will they return the deposit?
What makes you think I'll lose?
Even if I lose, as long as I get more than 5% of the votes,
the deposit will be returned.
The risks are too high, son!
Dad?
If you have a tough opponent,
you won't even get 5% votes.
You were here the whole time?
Why didn't you come out when I asked for signatures,
but decided to show your faces now?
We're not voters. We can't sign for you.
I didn't want you to be in debt.
That's why I came out to remind you.
Right! We always support what you do!
That's right!
Some support you're giving me!
You think I can’t even pay back $3,000.
Listen to your parents, know your opponent.
Or you'll only lose the $3,000.
Hing tells us the Fujian Fried Rice Association is having a draw tonight
to pick their candidate to run for office.
I'll go to the restaurant and find out who my opponent is.
Lam Tsoi-yeh, we support you...
The Fujian Fried Rice Association has been around for almost 100 years.
We have always abided by the teachings of our predecessors
in hosting this fried rice ceremony.
Let's hope our predecessors will watch us pick our candidate.
Fujian Fried Rice Association, for you, for him, for the community!
Let's drink up!
Cheers! Cheers!
Let the fried rice begin!
Mam...
Why do we have this ceremony?
You're all so young.
Do you know from where the name Fujian Fried Rice Association came?
No!
Back then it was hard to make a living in Hong Kong.
Our founding members sold seafood for a living.
To ensure the neighbours were well fed,
they'd make fried rice with the leftover seafood.
Fujian is famous for its seafood,
and our predecessors speak with a Fujian accent,
so people started to call the dish Fujian fried rice.
Naturally the association was named Fujian Fried Rice Association.
When the Association was trying to pick a representative for charity work,
someone bit on a razor clam in the fried rice.
He happened to be chosen as the representative that year.
Since then, whenever we pick a representative,
we would have the fried rice ceremony,
whoever has a razor clam in his or her bowl of rice
will be chosen as the representative.
Serve the razor clam!
Honey... What?
You'd better bite on the razor clam.
I want you to take up my mantle.
Don't worry. I'll pick a bowl without razor clam for you.
Thanks, Lam Tsoi-yeh!
Take a spin and let nature take its course.
Let's eat!
Why don't you take one? Go ahead!
Let's eat!
It's not me!
Not me either!
Not in my bowl!
Not me either!
You bit on it?
Yes! What now?
Nobody has it? Where is it?
Honey, is the razor clam in your bowl?
No? That's odd!
What are you going to do?
Swallow it! No!
Honey...
Are you alright?
Did you choke?
I hereby announce...
Miss Chai Ching-man is the 29th candidate for the Association.
Honey, you're brilliant!
You're now the representative!
Congratulations!
What's with the long face?
I don't want to run for office in the District Council
but Mom wants me to.
I don't know what to do.
Lam Tsoi-yeh, you must help me.
You're now my opponent.
Helping you is too inorganic.
Is being organic more important than me?
Don't say that!
You'll be challenging my philosophy.
You say you love me, but you wont help me with something so petty.
Staring at me with those innocent eyes is simply too much.
But I really need your help right now!
I admit, my philosophy has fallen apart because of you!
You'll help me?
Really?
I'll carry the toilet paper. Just stay away!
There's only one way those senior members will let you pull out.
You must convince them you cracked under enormous pressure.
Your mother loves you so much,
so naturally she'll urge you to drop out.
I can't act. How can I pretend to fly off the handle?
Acting is simple, the emotions must come from within.
But since you have never put on an act,
use something from the outside to bring out the emotions from within.
You're confusing me.
You're now one step closer to flying off the handle,
which includes muscle spasms, crying for no reason and bizarre behaviour.
How can I accomplish all these?
Of course you can!
This thing has a lot of functions...
Try this one...well?
Very comfy!
Then I must turn it up!
HEY”
Well? I can't...
What did you say? How's this? Better?
I feel dizzy...
Now that you've learnt to have spasms,
next you'll learn to cry for no reasons.
Hold on, will this make me pass out again?
I have never heard of eating wasabi making someone pass out.
You'll be more convincing when you talk after you have eaten it.
Tell them how much pressure you're under.
When people see you cry, they'll believe everything you say.
Really?
You should try it! OK!
Well? Ask me something.
What do you like about me?
You have nice legs.
Your eyes are beautiful.
Soft, silky skin.
Come on, be serious!
You helped me set up the webcasting station and do the programmes.
When I was broke, you'd buy me dinner.
You'd teach me how to run for office
and help me behind your Mom's back.
You're the most genuine and loveliest girl I have ever met.
You're one of the biggest reasons I decided to stay in Hong Kong.
The wasabi is so strong...
If what you taught me doesn't work,
what else can I do?
Then resort to bizarre behaviour.
How bizarre?
Carry this on you to show bizarre behaviour.
I'll call you tonight, OK?
Why?
What time is it, Lam Tsoi-yeh?
We're really talking on the phone till dawn?
Of course! You must stay up all night.
When you show up at the Association dinner,
you'd appear to be in a trance.
Great! I've never been up all night in my whole life.
I'd like to know how it feels.
Brace yourself!
Wm ma“!
What should we talk about?
Let's start with your hobbies.
Tell me...
Yes, I'm asking...
He's still on the phone at this late hour.
And he's giggling too!
What do you think is wrong with him?
He has lost his mind!
What?
Unless you think he's dating someone.
Right! Who'd want him?
Is the pressure from the election driving him crazy?
He wants to borrow $3,000 from me for the deposit!
Be prepared to kiss the money goodbye!
Then I'd better not lend him the money!
Let's go to sleep!
Just say it once, don't be a nag...
(Annual Dinner of the Fujian Fried Rice Association)
Almost everyone is here, you can go on stage
Are you alright?
I'm fine!
I'm in good shape!
I can tell.
You're taking pills?
An anti-depressant.
The psychiatrist said I'd be fine after taking these pills. Don't worry!
Mom! What?
I need to use the toilet!
Psychiatrist?
Tonight is the annual dinner for the Fujian Fried Rice Association,
I'd like to take this opportunity to introduce to you
Miss Chai Ching-man, our candidate for the upcoming by-election.
Today, thank you for your support, I... I have muscle spasms!
Are you alright, Ching-man?
I'm under too much pressure.
I get these spasms all the time!
That's good!
What?
One of our veterans came to cheer for you!
Who?
Mr Chai Tsau-kun (spasm).
He got spasms whenever he ran for office back then.
He's had those for over 20 yea rs now.
What?
The election always triggered the spasms.
The more spasms he had, the more votes he had.
I see a lot of him in you!
I'm sure you'll win the election.
Let's ask Ching-man to take the first bite of the lucky rice.
What's wrong now, Ching-man?
I have been emotionally unstable lately.
I'm actually very happy and want to laugh,
but somehow I just started to cry.
You're happy but you want to cry?
That's wonderful!
What?
You're exactly like her!
Who?
Chai Tsau-kun's sister Miss Chai Tsau-yup.
Bravo!
When Miss Chai ran for office,
she'd start to cry the minute she stepped into the room.
The harder she cried, the more votes she got
She eventually won with the most votes.
But she cried so much she became blind.
Let's have Miss Chai Ching-man say a few words...
I'd have to turn to my last resort!
I'm for www.zitaulomong.com!
Show your support for your opponent!
Wear this T-shirt and chant the slogan.
They won't let you run anymore.
I'm for www.zitaulomong.com!
We're for crushing www.zitaulomong.com!
Right? No!
Crush him...